Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Are You a Democrat, A Republican, or a Texan?

A friend sent this to my husband.

Are you a Democrat, a Republican , or a Texan? Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:


You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal. 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do? .......................................................


THINK CAREFULLY AND THEN SCROLL DOWN



Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour.

This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.
.......................................................


Republican's Answer:

BANG!


.......................................................

Texan's Answer:


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click..... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"

Son: "Can I shoot the next one!"

Wife: " You're not taking that to the Taxidermist!

4 Comments:

At 1:58 PM, Anonymous maxine said...

Oh dear, I'm a republican. Never thought I'd see the day when I was pigeonholed!

 
At 2:11 PM, Blogger Susan said...

Never mind, Maxine, by the strictest interpretation of those options, I'd have to classify myself as a Texan! My father had a couple of good motivational cliches - one was "In for a fight, in for a funeral" and the other "Don't strike until you can strike a killing blow". I wouldn't have any problem at all with doing what was necessary. I'm forever baffled by characters in movies who don't actually 'finish off' the bad guy. Anyway, this was just fun. I don't think the Democrats are nearly as ineffectual as the joke suggests, nor are all the Republicans as bloodthirsty or Texans all indiscriminately violent.

 
At 2:37 AM, Blogger Minx said...

There is a killer in all of us if our families are threatened. Bang, bang!

 
At 4:17 AM, Blogger Confucious Trevaskis said...

I'm a Texan first...followed by a hint of democrat after the event....who'd have thought.......

 

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